10/27/2004
Manhunt Update: A Rope To Hang Me With?
Hi, back again with another plate of cheese. These boys on Manhunt are just being far too nice to one another. The backstabbing ante needs to be upped a bit, imho. But once again, I watched.
After a brief opening segment where our models drank some seaweed Kool-Aid and pretended they were filming a television commercial a la Bill Murray's "Santory Time" spot in Lost in Translation, the meat of the show got underway. Can somebody please explain to me what that opening segment was about, or is having a laugh at the expense of the Japanese just fun? Oh I get it! The producers finally found a way to incorporate Asians into the show!
Then it was off to the spa in white robes for manicures, pedicures, and eyebrow plucking and waxing. Several of the models appeared genuinely nervous in this realm of womanly pampering, giggling like schoolgirls as Tate had his "caterpillar" eyebrows sheared off with hot wax.
The only one who didn't appear completely bewildered by the grooming treatments was gay bar strip tease aficionado Hunter Daniel, who showed up late to dinner because he lingered in the salon to finish plucking his own eyebrows, complaining, "They didn't do it right."
But there's nothing like a little gender bending to test the limits of one's masculinity, eh? Nothing was more telling than the dead silence in the room when the nelly stylist strolled in and said, "Hello gentlemen, or should I say ladies?"
Turns out it was a bit of cleverly placed dialogue, as the boys' next "task" was to gussy up in androgynous gear and make-up for a ziggy Stardust meets Mad Max-style photo shoot, in order to test their masculine comfort zones. And there's certainly nothing more entertaining than watching those not assured in their manliness get painted up with eyeliner, lipstick, and hairpieces.
Displaying Evangelista-esque qualities, South African diva Paulo wanted total control over his make-up and hair until the make-up artist slapped him down but good: "I don't need your input." (...bitch!)
We were a little worried about poor Hunter when he was shown his outfit — a plaid kilt, rather than the masculine chain-mail body armor he'd had his eye on. Worried about what the folks in Arkansas would think, Hunter hit the wall, literally. Would he just go off the deep end, Boy Meets Boy-Andra-style? Or would he pull himself together like a professional?
He soon stopped worrying about the skirt and began obsessing about why one side of his abs popped more than the other, causing Jason to comment, "I think he's more concerned about his abs than world peace."
I think he should probably be more concerned about the gay strip club photos that turned up last week than either of those things but I guess abs and world peace are what models tend to focus on these days.
Well, after a heady montage of pursing lips, tongue sticking out, and general worry about looking too gay, the photo shoots were finished.
Embedded Abercrombie model Kevin Peake advised the judges that "the ones that have potential to be supermodels" are Rob and Tate, despite Tate's procilivity to pee in cups rather than go down the hall to the Men's room. Rob, Towleroad's personal favorite of all the models (who next week is revealed to the others to be gay) worked really hard on this shoot and we applaud him.
His photo apparently revealed a very fierce vein sticking out of his forehead, most likely caused by all the stretching and upside-down acrobatic positions he was forced into. Rob's vein, however, provided the best line of the entire show, as Bruce Hulse analyzed the poor boy's photo:
"If nothing else there's tons of aspirin ads out there waiting for you."
Finally, ten points to exiting model gay boy Ron, for not only being out and proud, but also for displaying the most open womanly sobbing we've seen so far.
I'm sure he'll be okay, especially because he has a porn career to fall back on!
And can Carmen Electra be any less emotive? She makes Donald Trump's receptionist Robin look positively perky.
Past updates:
[Big Boys Don't Cry]
[Anyone Want Some Wood?]
[Attack of the Clones]
Posted 6:10 PM EST by Andy Towle in Fashion Men, Film & TV | Permalink
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Tate looks like the love child of John Kerry and Morgan Fairchild!
Posted by: Joe | Oct 27, 2004 6:22:31 PM
What was with next week's teaser about yummilicious Rob coming out -- Hunter has a break-down and sobs over it? Or was that just evil editing ...
Posted by: Mike | Oct 27, 2004 7:09:27 PM
Scandalous! And, I'm howling at Hunter's "they didn't do it right" line. I haven't decided who my favorite is, but I'm kinda with you and leaning toward Rob.
Posted by: Steve | Oct 27, 2004 7:15:16 PM
I watched it for the first time last night - Rob is by far the best! Gay or not I liked that he was "all in" when it came to telling the make-up artist "Do whatever you think is best" attitude. 10 points for that!
And what the Hell was up with all of them being so "scared" of a day at the spa!? Give me a break! Who in their right mind - Gay or Straight would mind a day of spa treatment!?
Posted by: Slate | Oct 27, 2004 7:35:05 PM
Did anyone catch Rob's comment at the spa? "Sure, I treat myself to a pedicure once a month." Totally deadpan. Uhm.. hello?
Rob is definitely my favorite; along with looks he's got the passion and dedication - and you would all have known he was gay if you read his bio once or four times. Jon is a close second - then probably Matt, if he toned up a bit.
Sorry Kevin P, but Tate does not cut it... maybe for a season in A&F.
Posted by: iilgemini | Oct 28, 2004 12:03:30 AM
Paulo's hot but I so love Rob. I hope he wins and aside from becoming a supermodel, he gets aspirin ads right and left. lol
Posted by: Glenn | Oct 28, 2004 11:18:00 AM
I thought it was pretty rich for Hunter to have a hissy fit about wearing a kilt considering the pictures of him writhing on a bar in Backstreets in a flourescent bikini. And Paulo, gorgeous as he is, has a personality about as colorful as a Soviet housing project.
Posted by: Paul | Oct 28, 2004 12:03:45 PM
What about the gratuitous ass shot that Bravo ran of Tate? It was shocking.
Posted by: Dan B | Oct 29, 2004 2:57:28 PM