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02/17/2006

Penis Restaurant Opens in Beijing

Dog_penisThose of you who get the occasional craving for horse cock are in luck. A new restaurant has opened in Beijing that specializes in such dishes, which promise to improve virility.

On the menu are the male sexual organs of yaks, donkeys, dogs, oxen, seals, horses, goats, and deer.

Waitresses participate in special training to work at the restaurant:

One speciality, Canadian seal penis, costs a hefty £220, and requires ordering in advance. Miss Liu confessed that Guo-li-zhuang was an unusual place to work, partly because of her training - she has to recite tales proving the vigour of the animals in question as they are being eaten - and partly because of the interaction with the clientele. "I did find it embarrassing at first," she said. "And sometimes the customers take advantage of me by asking rude questions."

The reviewer for the UK Telegraph found the dog penis "rather gamey" and the horse and donkey testicles "slightly crumbly", although they're not recommended for women because the testosterone "may interfere with fertility."

Gobble gobble!

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Comments

  1. Yippee, now we can look forward to yet another Chinese dietary trend obliterating the wild animal population...as if bear gall bladders wasn't enough. On the other hand, I'll bet VP Cheney could sell a quail dick. Oops, it wasn't a quail he shot. That's tasteless, I can't post it.

    Damn, I hit post by mistake.

    Posted by: JT Stout | Feb 17, 2006 10:20:42 AM


  2. Check out the GQ article on weird food in New York, and the author's search for "chicken assholes." (issue with Heath Ledger on cover)

    Posted by: huh@huh.com | Feb 17, 2006 10:22:10 AM


  3. I just threw up in my mouth a little.

    Posted by: Brian | Feb 17, 2006 10:38:13 AM


  4. Gag me with a .....spoon.

    Posted by: Mikey | Feb 17, 2006 10:47:39 AM


  5. I think I'm going to be sick!

    Posted by: Timothy | Feb 17, 2006 10:49:41 AM


  6. Very disturbing and sad to think there is a market for this kind of thing. The saddest part is that those dogs are often companion animals or they are kept in such horrible conditions before being killed that we in the west can hardly imagine.

    Posted by: Dan Valdes | Feb 17, 2006 10:53:58 AM



  7. As JT Stout said above, just what we need is another Chinese food fetish working to wipe out animal populations on the Earth so a half billion Chinese men can get it up longer to produce even more of themselves. Once again the little head does the thinking. Apparently, some of these guys have been doing okay enough to populate that part of Asia. I cannot imagine the TV marketing for this. Oh, Lee Chan, let's whack off Fido's pecker so you can give it to me good tonight.

    Posted by: Bill | Feb 17, 2006 11:17:30 AM


  8. Damn I wish my skin would stop crawling away I actually have a social schedule this weekend and skin would be nice.

    Posted by: Donald | Feb 17, 2006 11:18:55 AM


  9. Brings new meaning to the term "The Chinese restaurant dicked me over on my take-out order. They forgot the ox testicles."

    Posted by: mark | Feb 17, 2006 12:48:01 PM


  10. Do I get to choose my order to be cut or uncut?

    Posted by: kevin | Feb 17, 2006 2:13:30 PM


  11. Well I just started a diet and this article is a great appetite suppressant...

    Posted by: matt | Feb 17, 2006 4:44:01 PM


  12. Damn... is that a cultural issue? If that is so, there are cultures I do NOT understand (and I do NOT feel like understanding). Yet, I am not ready to advocate animal's rights in China. They should begin first with human rights, anyway, I guess.

    Posted by: Thierry | Feb 17, 2006 5:02:18 PM


  13. Absolutely GROSS.

    Posted by: Lady Heather | Feb 17, 2006 5:11:09 PM


  14. I studied Chinese culture (among others), and it is common in impoverished nations to "use every piece of the animal" when it comes to food. This whole "Donkey testicles will make you strong!" is essentially the tale told to sell a product that, otherwise would never be considered for human consumption. The issue of eating dog, cat, rat or snake is also founded in poverty where... it's the only meat available.

    My ancestry were Eastern European. When famine struck, and at the height of the great depression, both my parents talk about their parents raising the pigs and chicken for slaughter; where the only thing that didn't get eaten was the oink and squawk. Nothing went to waste; same in China.

    Just thank the maker that we here, now live in a monitary society where we can choose what to eat or not eat.

    I have to side with the Dan; though. I hope to hell this eating seal penis does not turn into some shi-shi Paris-Hilton-ite trend; That's just stupid. There are enough livestock raised for human consumption. If you feel inclined to eat a wild animal just because it's trendy, you deserve to get the same clubbing that the seal got.

    And yes, I am a carnivor. I eat meat. Until something bigger knocks me off the top of the food chain, everything from lobster to prime rib is fair game.

    Posted by: Rad | Feb 17, 2006 6:02:25 PM


  15. You guys will lick some guys shitter but you draw the line at dried horse cock?

    I guess you could stick it up some guys ass and suck it out...if that makes it taste better.

    Posted by: Matthew Schooler | Feb 17, 2006 6:26:39 PM


  16. http://www.furisdead.com/feat/ChineseFurFarms/

    This made me so sick I wanted to boycott Chinese Take-Out, Chinese Food and EVERYTHING MADE IN CHINA for the rest of my life. We need to know about this and as sickening as it is, WE NEED TO TELL OTHERS regardless of how upset they will be.

    When you see the frightened eyes of the cats and the sad eyes of the dogs, you will barely know the terror they are about to endure.

    If this is TRULY the YEAR OF THE DOG, then let it be so!

    Please. Spread the word, especially if you can't send money!

    KNOWLEDGE IS POWER! Thanks!

    Posted by: Bernard | Feb 17, 2006 6:59:04 PM


  17. Thanks Rad for your enlightning comment. (I mean it)

    But still... there is something that is not working here: we're talking about a restaurant "Situated in an elegantly restored house beside Beijing's West Lake", where businessmen and governmental officials go... Far far far away from "anything founded in poverty"...

    Posted by: Thierry | Feb 17, 2006 7:23:04 PM


  18. >>The testicles were slightly crumbly, and tasted better with lashings of the sesame, soy and chilli dips thoughtfully provided.

    I had lunch there with Jeffrey Dahmer there once, and we found the sweet and sour sauce was very nice with the testicles as well.

    We welcome our friends in China to the civilised world.

    Posted by: Jay Croce | Feb 17, 2006 8:35:37 PM


  19. The cultural menality behind it isn't by any means new. Disturbing but not really a surprise.

    Posted by: moby | Feb 17, 2006 9:24:39 PM


  20. Um, wait. This is ONE gross restaurant in Peking for sure but I am seeing out of line reactions like "to wipe out animal populations on the Earth so a half billion Chinese men can get it up longer to produce even more of themselves."
    Certainly this menu is appauling, but comments like the above begin to cross the boundary into sensationalism and, well r-sm.
    Consider this: What would you think of someone going off on gay men across the board after reading just one story about boys molested by a priest? Come on, be cool.

    Posted by: jason | Feb 17, 2006 10:49:54 PM


  21. Well, that was something I didn't need to know.

    Posted by: CJ | Feb 18, 2006 2:21:45 AM


  22. i agree with rad. sometimes it's good that we try to be more informed about things instead of just lashing at it ethnocentrically just because we dont do those things. it doesnt mean we have to agree to them, but we have to stop thinking that we are often more culturally superior than any other culture.

    i agree some of the stuff in there e.g the seal thing is a little uncalled for but not all cultures around the world will look at certain animals as pets. i wont eat my cat, but i cant say i will jeer the people of poor countries for eating them as food. as much as it breaks my heart. for them its just another level in the food chain. after years of practice, the feeling of endearment for these animals as pets, even when they've becomed developed nations, just didnt exist.
    so they dont see anything wrong with it.

    the only way to go is for us not to eat it if we think its wrong. apply our moral standards to us. we will never be able to fully understand other people's cultures and reasoning. but knowing this is good. at least now you know both sides of the story.

    people eat bulls testicles here too you know.


    Posted by: Fendi | Feb 18, 2006 8:51:01 AM


  23. Yes, Thierry, it's all the way the culture plays up the origins. Now it IS "shi-shi" to eat dog scrotum because some idiot with a shit load of money believes that he can buy himself one step closer to immortality since he already bought into the cultural mythos behind the food. And of course, there is ALWAYS someone waiting to capitalize on the it.

    And Matthew, no animals are ever harmed when rimming. At least, not yet.

    Something about Richard Gere and gerbils come to mind, but that's another topic, all together.

    Posted by: Rad | Feb 18, 2006 1:05:23 PM


  24. Thanks Rad.
    Greed inspired wrongful conducts by Chinese merchants and polititians are surely condamnable, but you see, China and CHinese as a whole have become the easy target in the West lately to be utilized as "see, we (the West or U.S.) are not alone in making errors in the world, but the Chinese are far lower!"

    Posted by: jason | Feb 18, 2006 4:43:39 PM


  25. I am shocked--SHOCKED!!--to discover that other cultures have cuisines and customs that are markedly different from ours!

    I will take it upon myself to be repulsed, and to insist that we boycott all different cultures, belief systems, and any other thing that strikes me as being all gross and yucky!!

    -- Pete

    Posted by: Pete | Feb 21, 2006 11:41:51 AM


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